It’s Kinda Like Dating-Italy, Spain, and the EPO

by Danie Roy

 

I will never forget this one history teacher I had.  Big guy, football coach, reeeeeeally thick southern accent.  He had a favorite analogy for governments and all major historical events, and it seemed to fit perfectly every time.  The big analogy was always cued by a phrase that I use to this day: “it’s kinda like dating…”

For example, let’s say that the European Union Patent Office (EPO) is the guy, and Italy and Spain are two lovely ladies.  Well, right now, the girls are having a fight with him, crying all night and writing in their diaries that he’s horrible and he never loved them.

Of course, in a relationship, the guy is either to blame or going to be blamed.  So what did he do?  Call the girls fat?  Never call?  Forget their birthdays?  Cheat on them?  Reject them?

Well, the girls say that he just doesn’t understand them!  He doesn’t speak their language!  I mean he literally doesn’t speak their language.  Italy and Spain are claiming that the EPO is discriminating against them by only operating in English, French, and German.

I can see their point (sort of): translation isn’t cheap, and if you’re going to translate a patent application… well, what’s the going rate for 100 pages of translation, give or take 50 or so?

The first thought that comes to my mind is: “well, what about all the other countries in the EU that speak other languages?  Are they all going to band together and seek patent equality for all?”

The second thought is “you have got to be kidding me.”

English, German, and French are currently among the most common languages of commerce.  English, thanks to the British Empire of decades past and American love of the limelight; German, courtesy of WWII, great banking and pretty darn good engineering; and French, because of their contributions to art, fashion, modern lifestyles in general, and standardized measurements.

Before passing final judgment, it’s best to make sure you have all facts available, so I made sure to check the Patent Cooperation Treaty (PCT) list of publishing languages.  The list, in alphabetical order: Arabic, Chinese, English, French, German, Japanese, Korean, Portuguese, Russian, and Spanish.

I am not surprised to see that Italian wasn’t on the list but Spanish was.  Italian is a lovely language, but not particularly common.  Plenty of chefs and residents of Little Italy speak it fairly well, but, otherwise, Italian is mostly restricted to Italy.  Spanish, on the other hand, is spoken throughout North and South America.

So does Spain have a legitimate claim?  Well… sort of.  The PCT applies worldwide; the EPO applies to the EU.  I distinctly recall a friend of mine in international business telling me that Spanish was pretty useful to know in the Western Hemisphere, but it wasn’t widely spoken beyond our half of the world and lady Spain.

Finally, my point: EPO isn’t going to change for the ladies.  Even if he does, the girls will not be happy with him.  Why?  Because if the EPO gives in to Spain and Italy, he has to eventually give in to everyone in the EU.  When that happens, the EPO will be taking on the hiring (and cost) of translators for all of those languages.  And, no, the EPO will not be eating that cost.  Applications will continue to cost more and more until finally…

Filing for a patent costs more than we started with.  Oops.